Where is my Ferrari and Job in Hawaii?

I found a journal the other day. Mostly pointless ramblings by a much younger version of me, but there were certainly some clear “items” that I should have experienced by now.

For starters, I was supposed to be enjoying a lucrative private detective career on Oahu Island; driving around a Ferrari and living life with my friend who flies helicopters for a living.

Clearly that one did not pan out somehow.

My second career was as a Hollywood stunt man by day and bounty hunter by night.

Never happened.

Matter of fact, I never owned a black Pontiac Trans Am that spoke to me, never captured bad guys on the streets of NY, never solved medical dilemmas in under an hour, and I never battled siblings over the direction and control of my family empire.

Man, have I got some catching up to do. Anybody else missing something?

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark

Fifty Years of Math 1959 – 2009 (in the USA )

MathNot sure where this came from, but it cracks me up for some, sad, reason…

Fifty Years of Math 1959 – 2009 (in the USA )

Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter girl took my $2 and I was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her.. She stood there , holding the nickel and 3 pennies , while looking at the screen on her register.

I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters , but she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to explain the transaction to her , she stood there and cried. Why do I tell you this? Because of the evolution in teaching math since the 1950s:

1. Teaching Math In 1950s [Read more...]

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark

The Demise of Victoria’s Secret

pajama285I used to like Victoria’s Secret. It was the perfect place to find a great gift for my wife for Christmas, Anniversary, or just because I did something stupid and needed to make up for it.

I suspect a trip to Victoria’s Secret is much different for men then it is for women. I am not sure what women are looking for but I do know what men are looking for: Less is More.

Years ago, my first trip to buy something for my wife lead to a very displeased shop attendant. In my defense, I don’t think it was my fault. [Read more...]

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark

Cleaning Elves on “90-Day” Notice

garbage dumpAs I meandered around the house this morning picking up various items left behind by my daughter I realized the cleaning elves are now on notice.

Not by choice mind you, she is going away to college. In addition to all the social aspects she will now learn, she will have to deal with the cleaning elves not making the trip with her and the oddity of items left about will actually remain there until dealt with personally.

We have all been the cleaning elf (or should have been) and, at some point of our life, received the benefit of a cleaning elf. Frankly, I miss them.

Cleaning elves follow closely behind you, but not so close as to be seen, recognized, or appreciated. [Read more...]

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark

BBQ Is No Joke…ok, it is.

bbqmen285Funny? Yes. Sexist? Probably a bit…but still funny.

We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion: [Read more...]

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark

What Happened to “Accidental Knowledge?”

gumteacherI think I have just about written off any chance of children in the not-too-distant future getting a good education. 

I have never been one for private schools. Not having been personally I found some of their strategies for teaching to be less “real world” than a good public school. To me, it really came down to the kid and the level of the parent’s involvement. 

With that said, I think private schools may become the only real option for kids to excel in the future. Not because of the quality of teachers, dress codes, or morning affirmations. No, I think private schools will win because of lack of phones and ipods. 

I have always been aware kids take ipods and phones to school. Sure, one is for “safety” and the other, well, that is in case you get bored (you decide which is which). 

Anyway, the teachers in the beginning confiscated items left and right. If an iPod or phone was in view, it was taken away, disappearing into a drawer that used to be filled with firecrackers and back issues of Playboy. [Read more...]

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark

WTF?? More Choices for Gas?

gaspumps285I give up. I think I have mentioned before I am the guy who avoids The Cheesecake Factory because their menu scares the hell out of me. Too many choices and there is no way you can be good at cooking that many items. 

This week I found this at my local gas pump….More gas choices?

Was there a large public outcry of people that felt they did not have enough octane options? [Read more...]

Keep the Godfather Caffeinated! Donate to the Diet Pepsi Fund.

  • Share/Bookmark