Valentines Day is this Saturday. Fortunately for me, my wife is not big on “manufactured” holidays. This means I don’t really get her anything. Seriously. This isn’t one of those “don’t get me anything” and then “hope he does” either; we have been married far too long. I know she would rather have me do something nice on another day then one that has been forced on men sometime ago when the greeting card company needed a few bucks.
Frankly, it is a good thing she wants me to skip it. I realized most of what I learned about dating (or women for that matter) came from movies.
Here is what I have learned…
If there is a “bad” guy and a “nice” guy in the film, the nice guy gets the girl in the end but only after she breaks up with the bad guy for cheating on her.
The girl will always end up with the guy from the other side of the tracks, especially if there is dancing involved.
The girls’ best friend is always off limits – unless that is whom you were meant to be with AND you have a best friend to step in your place.
What you drive matters. It needs to be a new sports car, an old classic, or a scooter.
A guy can never be over dressed for a date.
Relationships always end up stronger if there is a lot of phone time in the beginning.
If the relationship starts in High School and you go to separate colleges, something tragic is going to happen to one of you.
Delivery guys never seem to get “traditional” tips.
If the girls’ mother is hot, you are in trouble. If she is not, you are in trouble.
It never works out well if someone has access to a cabin in the words.
If you are single, ugly, and have the ability to make things out of sticks – you will die that way. No reason to worry about dating.
Distressed people going on “holiday” always find their soul mate during that time. Not so coincidently, they will always have an accent.
And you wondered why my wife doesn’t want me to get her anything for Valentines Day?
Fine, I suppose this is where you look for some witty insights to my mind. A "bio" of sorts. Here is the deal... I ride motorcycles, smoke cigars, golf, kayak, fly, race my car through the mountains, write (a lot), and travel extensively. I am almost old enough not to care what other people think about me...almost. ~Godfadr
You mean you’re not going to get her that Italian immigrant model guy who rides around on a scooter delivering pizzas who has the current world record for non-traditional “tips”???
Funny! I only use Valentine’s Day as a good excuse to eat a lot of chocolate. I would buy it for myself if my husband didn’t. I wouldn’t be mad either, because who could be mad while stuffing their face with chocolate?
I have to admit, Chocolate is the one thing we can get for each other. It is not exactly a written rule, but one of us always seems to pick some up (usually right after when they go on sale). Dark Chocolate please!
fun article!
Fred…
okay…so it wasn’t the greatest movie – but there was a good line
Tom Cruise in Cocktail – “everything ends badly – otherwise it wouldn’t end”
cheers!
Sky