Cherry Flavored Cherries?

Admittedly, I am confused pretty easily. Not so much as the common deer-stuck-in-headlights kind of confused – but close.

I stumbled upon these little gems in the grocery store the other day. Suddenly I was confused.

A pie comes in a variety of flavors. Apple, pecan, lemon, and yes, even cherry. But cherries do not come in a multitude of flavors. They come in…ummm….cherry.

So what gives and where will this end?

You can’t have bacon stuffed bacon (trust me, I have looked).

There is no Kool-Aid flavored soda.

You can’t have apple stuffed apples.

And you can’t have cherries that taste like pie.

Pie is useless without help…

You can’t have pie flavored anything without the actual fillers.

I think “pie” has been riding this lofty wave long enough. It is time that someone calls pie out for what it actually is…a big hunk of dough whose only use is to hold together something yummy.

No one asks for “more pie but hold the filing please.” It just doesn’t happen.

Matter of fact, I have seen many a people leave extra pie bits on the plate – that almost never happens with the filling.

Nope…this makes no sense to me.

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark

Glenn Beck Going Blind or Just Another Stunt?

Whether it is crying on cue or making up stuff about a politician, Glenn Beck knows one thing. To stay in the spotlight you need to be part Jerry Springer, part circus performer, and part salesman.

Glenn Beck says he might be going blind. The Fox News host told an audience in Salt Lake City Saturday that he’s been having trouble focusing his eyes, and a doctor said he has macular dystrophy. Prognosis unclear.

I used to think Beck had some decent ideas (his last decent book was An Inconvenient Book: Real Solutions to the World’s Biggest Problems).

Now, of course, he has just gone off the deep end, trying to create a mob mentality that will spend more time finger pointing than they will looking for ideas.

I fully expect Beck to come up with “My eyes are going because they can’t stand to see America being destroyed.” or something to that effect. If he really is/does lose his eyesight, that would be unfortunate, even for someone that spends most of his time wishing demise on other people.

In the end Beck is not unlike every other person in that spotlight. They discovered it is much easier to shoot at others than it is to look for solutions. If the other camp doesn’t have enough dirt on it…just make crap up – most people will never look for facts anyway.

I think adults during my childhood were right. It is too much television – regardless of which side of the screen you are on. At least that is the way I see it…

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark

Is That a Monkey In Your Pocket?

Belt Made of Live Monkeys? WTF?

Mexico arrests man with 18 monkeys around his waist? I have heard a lot of different things being smuggled…but monkeys?

Roberto Sol Cabrera, a Mexican citizen, was stopped at a random check at Mexico City’s international airport after arriving from Lima.

In a statement, police said Mr Cabrera Zavaleta had been behaving “nervously”.

Once he was searched, it was discovered that he had hidden 18 titi monkeys in a girdle around his waist.

After his arrest, Mr Sol Cabrera confessed that the animals had travelled in his luggage, and that he had put them under his clothing “to protect them from X-rays” as he was going through customs.

You just can’t make this stuff up…read the whole story here (not that there is much more to say).

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark

Best Seat Belt Advertisement Ever!

Great Video. Probably the best seat belt advertisement ever created.

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark

The Cyber Cyrano

It really was only a matter of time for online dating to be offered the services of the legendary Cyrano.

Why write your own lame online dating profile when a modern-day cupid can transform your life into something extraordinary and date worthy?

Of course, this trend does not need to stop with someone writing your profile or answering your emails in a wittier-than-you-tone.

Why not have someone fill in for the first couple dates?

Let’s face it. The first couple dates can be awkward. The pressure of where to go, what to do, the first kiss, the first time you – well, you know. Heck with that, send a stand-in.

The stand-in would then report back how it all went. Kind like a modern day The Truth About Cats & Dogs.

The stand-in would look like you (only better)

They would act like you (only smarter)

They would make promises you can’t live up to (but then again, you would have as well).

Heck, maybe you could even skip the whole courtship all-together and just “meet” on your wedding day. Wait, maybe the stand-ins get married so you don’t have to ever miss a poker night or book club meetings….

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark

BP Offshore Oil Strike Game from 1970

Funny that the BP Offshore Oil Strike game never really made it to the United States – well, at least in game form.

Two to Four Players compete at exploring for oil and building platforms. Players must avoid the “hazard cards” which read such set-backs as, “Blow-out! Rig Damaged,” and “Oil Clean Up Cost. Pay $1 Million.”

$1 Million? BP wishes it was only that much.

The rest of the info on the game is even more sketchy than the actual disaster. Supposedly endorsed by BP and other oil companies the game was produced around 1970 with little sales (wow, there is a surprise).

I suspect this game will now emerge from dark closets across Europe and start selling on eBay along with Connect Four Hurricanes and Chutes and Failed Car Companies.

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark

Toys banned in some California fast food restaurants

I just don’t know what to make of this. Certainly on one side is the responsible parent thing since I seriously doubt the kids are driving themselves to McDonald’s to pick up a toy.

The other side of me is just thinking, “really?”

Having free toys in some happy meals is going to be the downfall of our youth? And where does this end?

Perhaps doctors should not give out lollipops to the kids after a shot. I mean, the kids might want to shoot up heroine in their adulthood to get that feeling back.

What about that bowl of hard candy at Grandma’s house (you know the one where they are all stuck together)? Sure they are free for now, but how do I know that granny doesn’t start selling them in the high school parking lot once we are all hooked?

Sorry, I digress; it is suppose to be about the toys….

I guess Toys R Us should stop advertising toys because it might make kids want…well…toys!

I mean buying toys means spending money.

And spending money is a serious problem in this county (from the top down). So maybe we shouldn’t allow anything, toys or otherwise, that may have people spending money.

Just so you don’t think the issue is lost on me, I know it is about the calorie count in the happy meals. Fine. Give the kid a toy with any meal.

Restaurants could care less “what” meal the little Johnny buys (healthy or otherwise) – they just want the parents to come in and order as well.

***Be a Part of the Conversation and ADD A COMMENT***

  • Share/Bookmark