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Hot Dogs Added to Endangered Species…

May 26, 2008 By Godfadr Leave a Comment

 7 Billion! 

 That is the number of hot dogs that  are expected be senselessly consumed  between Memorial Day and Labor  Day. 

 Sure, they are one of America’s hottest  icons (insert Apple Pie and Baseball  here) but at what price to the overall food consumption “circle of life?”

 Do hot dogs not have feelings too? Are  they not consumed at such an alarming  rate that it jeopardizes the stability of  the worldwide mustard or sauerkraut trade?

Why do hot dog buns come in packs of twelve while hot dogs come in packs of ten? *Sure it bothers some of us, but of the 50,000 consumer letters Oscar Mayer gets each year, only about 15 ever mention this as a concern. 

I think Bratwurst run a close second in overall “dog like” consumption – but only if the Green Bay Packers are playing that weekend. 

The ACLU and like organizations need to address these hot dog injustices before it gets out of control – Fourth of July is just around the corner! 

Oh yea…Happy Memorial Day! 

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Filed Under Culture, Humor Tagged With Hot Dog Buns, Hot Dogs, How Many Hot Dogs Consumed, Humor

Too Many Choices…

May 23, 2008 By Godfadr Leave a Comment

They say that stress sometimes comes from having too many choices.

You only need to spend five minutes with a dinner menu at Cheesecake Factory to realize how true that really is.

I was reminded of this dilemma when I went to purchase a loaf of bread at the grocery store. This seemingly easy task turned into an outing that would be more difficult then taking a pack of sugar infused 4-year olds to Disneyland.

When I was young, I think we had two choices — wheat or white. Now there are 2,459 types of bread to choose from. You have wheat, white, whole grain, multi-grain, half grain, etc., etc.

Not sure I fully understand the “grain” thing. Is seven-grain better than six-grain? What about 12-grain?

I feel like calling my sixth grade woodshop teacher for help — 220 grain sandpaper was fairly smooth; 80 grain sandpaper was very rough; six or seven grain? That sounds like wheat boulders, not bread slices. I can’t swallow that.

The name doesn’t help me much either. Wonder Bread. I don’t think about bread much let alone “wonder” about it.

Please, for the sake of all that is good in the world, start cutting out some of my bread options. McDonald’s knows this. I only have to order by number. If other food producers followed suit, I think I would be happier with fewer choices.

Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go find milk. 

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Filed Under Culture, Humor Tagged With Confusion, Humor, Too Many Choices

No “F” Grade Left Behind…New School Grading System…

May 22, 2008 By Godfadr 10 Comments

Apparently getting an F is not bad enough; we now have to determine what type of F the student gets.

The new type of grading policy being adopted by schools across the U.S. is having 50 percent be the “low” if a student fails, citing that if a student fails, it is often difficult to make up the grade later in the year. 

You are kidding right?! 

In addition to dumbing down the classes to make sure we leave no child behind, we now want to make sure the kids that are failing don’t feel like they are that far behind? 

Correct me if I am wrong, if you have a 50 percent F versus a 30 percent F, you still failed — right?! 

Hey, some people get to be astronauts; some people get to ask “for here or to go?”. Making them feel better about their F, or making it easier to come back to a D isn’t going to make the difference.

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Filed Under Culture Tagged With New Scoring System, No F Grades, Student Grades

Real Estate Booming…Wait, Strike That…

May 22, 2008 By Godfadr Leave a Comment

I wish the media would get on the same page regarding the current real estate cycle. It appears there are two distinct sides right now. 

In the right corner, people who believe prices are as low as they can buy now and prepare to be the next Donald Trump as the ever-increasing values make them millionaires, practically overnight. 

In the left corner, people who believe we have not seen the bottom of a never-ending spiral back to the time when we left caves, hunted for grubs, and prepared for nightfall since we did not have electricity. 

It seems that both camps have divided and agreed on which days their views and opinions will be represented in the media. Values going up (odd days); values going down (even days).

The fact is that no one has a clue where we are going, but amazingly, many people still don’t know how we got to this point. I take it they didn’t read my earlier post, Economy Greed or Stupidity, or they are just in denial. 

In the end it will play out however it does, and hopefully, we have learned from it. We need to continue to make this country as self-sufficient (and educated) as we can; the rest will take care of itself. 

Prediction from The Slow Bleed? We won’t see a solid direction until six months after the election — The Obama vs. Hillary show is still the latest big thing to hit the media since the anniversary of Pop Rocks. 

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Filed Under Economy, Humor Tagged With Economy, Housing Prices, Humor, Values going down, Values going up

Death of Spouse Still Worse…

May 21, 2008 By Godfadr Leave a Comment

Well, it is good to know the death of a spouse still ranks worse than the recession, declining stocks and soft home values.

According to a new survey from ING, every demographic group said the death of their spouses would be a much greater threat to their families’ future financial situations than the current state of the economy. 

Here is a big surprise: ING sells life insurance.  

Just in case you need a few more things to make you feel better; here are a couple other things from The Slow Bleed that could be worse than a poor economy… 

·      Planet being destroyed by a meteor 

·      Diet Pepsi being pulled off the market 

·      No one ever inventing Rice Krispie Squares 

·      Planet destroyed by mock alien attack 

·      The Green Bay Packers becoming privately owned 

·      Scrubs taken off the air 

·      Planet destroyed by…well anything 

There, don’t we all feel better about the economy now? Hopefully the spouse thing was still worse than my other list.

 

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Filed Under Economy, Humor Tagged With Economy, Humor, ING Survey

US Currency Discriminates Against Blind…and the Poor…

May 21, 2008 By Godfadr Leave a Comment

A federal appeals court ruled the current currency used in the United States discriminates against blind people because all of the paper currency feels the same and is the same size. 

The Treasury will now consider adding either a foil surface that would differentiate the bills by feel or making each of denominations a different size. Either will cost millions to implement both in reprinting and the retooling of vending machines, ATM’s, and similar day-to-day items. 

Fair enough. While we are at it, here are a few more things that appear to be discriminatory we need to address…

Money – Not just discriminatory to the blind, the poor don’t seem to have access to enough of it. 

Oil – Seems the US did not get it’s fair share in world-wide distribution. 

Genetic Appearance – Face it, some people just aren’t that attractive. 

Athletics – Some of us were not meant to play sports beyond a Wii. 

Genetic Aptitude – Face it, some people just aren’t that smart. 

Dairy – Lactose intolerant people want ice cream too! 

Computer Skills – Seems some people need to stick with paper and pen. 

Parallel Parking – You either have the skill or you don’t. All parking should be “straight in.” 

The English Language – A challenge for many people coming into this country to learn. Perhaps English needs to be changed to be more like their native languages. 

Taxes – Some people get to pay little, some pay a lot. Seems discriminatory to me.   

Meat – Some people have too high of cholesterol to eat meat every day. 

Did I miss anything? 

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Filed Under Culture, Economy, Humor Tagged With Blind, Currency, Discrimination, Humor, Money, US Currency

The Slow Bleed Question of The Week…

May 21, 2008 By Godfadr Leave a Comment

Up this week…

What qualities in a candidate do you look for when determining your vote for President? 

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Filed Under Culture, Economy, Pride Tagged With Question of the Week, The Slow Bleed
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